Mood Swings
(2004)

So much helplessness felt inside that tears through my mortal coil
 I watched every second of the clock... tick tock... tick tock
There was a pair of eyes staring at me the other day
An intense lock that seemed surreal, A dream imitating life
Its all seems so trivial while it remains the reason for living
A twist of life forcing your journey through impermeable walls
At times I feel I've come so far, Only to be torn down
What defines me, what is it that calls itself my home?

If I fail
 Will nothing counter the attacks of the overwhelming panic

True love is what I searched for, for so long.. forlorn
Wishes of just giving one self to another
Overwhelming heartbeats
In love with love the pathetic helpless romantic
Truly stands alone

God please get away from me! God please answer me!
Is it wrong for me to pray? I scream and rant showing only futility

From the start of it all I was blind to your acidic tongue
A pharmacy of emotions to line up with the bottles that plague me
Someone just tell me what the fuck I did wrong.. Is it too much to ask?
Can I not just atone for my sins? Am I truly alone?

I look out the time stained glass as my limited reality passes by
The person sitting right beside me I cannot reach, alone I search
As if everything that is beautiful in this world is black & red in my eyes

When I fail
The piece of myself that bleeds only justifies I am alive

Where were you when the sun rose that day, when I opened my eyes
Did you ever think of me, or was it just a waste of your time
Was it easier to just leave me behind
Now I just close my eyes and see you in my mind

Drowning in my dreams
Demons rule this existence
A fog that has fallen locks me from truths
Is it I like been locked away or some trick you play?
Visions of a life I never lived, no offers to help me on my plight

A chemical reaction, decimated memories of retraction
All these years, emotions twisted from hatred to intrigue
Life just pisses me off, You piss me off, I piss myself off
From one to the other, my mind & my mood swings

Jer OC © 2006, Metalwood Inc.™ since 1988